Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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What's the difference between a piano and a fish? A piano is an instrument, fish is an animal

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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a black man walks out of popeyes

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Whats the best things about 25 year olds? Theres 20 of them.

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A man walked into my repair shop asking why his TV didn't work. I told him it was broken.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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what's the only thing worse than losing a pen before a test? getting raped by a pedifile. -teagan doherty-

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What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

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Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? To honor his father, Jonathan "Red" Hoffner, who was tragically killed in the line of duty. While attempting to save 3 small children in a trailer park fire, the elder firefighter suffered 3rd degree burns over 80 percent of his body. "Red" was rushed to a local hospital and lingered for several agonizing days. He began to rally but a careless error by a night nurse led to his unfortunate demise. His son was psychologically unable to wear anything but red suspenders every day for the rest of his life - not only because of his father's death but also because it was he who had maliciously set the fire in the first place.

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Last week, one of my ex girlfriends called me. She said she had to tell me some bad news. "I don't know how to tell you this but I have AIDS. I really didn't know how to reply to that so I said the only thing I could say. "Yeah, I know."

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What is brown and green and goes 100 mph? A tree falling down on your house.

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what is red and smells like paint red paint

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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An English man, Irish man and a Scotsman walk into a bar. And have a wonderful evening of multicultural entertainment and fun together.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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dalas rof rezilitref taerg a si citsalp. Read it from right to left.

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Why was Charles bleeding, because he was stabbed in the head with a needle

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Why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Because you would get charged with vehicular manslaughter and have the NAACP all up in your ass.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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