Your mother is so fat that she is considered morbidly obese. In fact, she should seriously consider a weight loss diet to reduce her risk of heart disease and diabetes.

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

A bartender walks into a bar. I know what you're thinking. You think he works there but that is not correct. He works at a different bar. Anyways, he buys a few drinks and leaves. He was impressed with the service.

why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

what do Russians play? Tetris, what else?

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

There are stars in the sky when it's dark. You may have noticed I used a contraction in the previous sentence.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

whats a funny joke? nuthing nuthing at all

Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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