Enters password. Sorry your password must contain the entire alphabet, your left foot, a theme song to a television show, and the blood of your enemies. Enters password. Password Strength: Weak

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who threw beer on livvy barnett? Cam irwin.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Who cut the cheese? It's sliced so evenly.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

On September 11th 2001, A worker of North twin tower man woke up to find his dog had chewed on his brand new phone. He went down stairs and realized his kitchen window had been broken. Getting ready to leave for work and saw his radio had been stolen out of his car. After finally making it to work and settling down in his office he spilled coffee on his lap. Enraged, the man yelled, "How could today get any worse!?"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I knew a little girl once. She was ate before she was seven.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why didn't the busy San Francisco business man hear his alarm clock ring this morning? A nuclear bomb blast occurred 700 meters from his front door. The estimated blast radius was approximately 100 square miles. Naturally, his alarm clock didn't make it.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock who's there atch watch who? bless you

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

thumb_up thumb_down -9

roses are red, violets are blue... thats what they tell me because im blind

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

You're mama's SO stupid that when she applied to college, they were happy to help.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between a Gay Man and a Straight Woman? Anatomy.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops