You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

What did Justin beiber get for Christmas? A dildo.

Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

teacher: who's going to pass english? students: us teacher: not you, i lied about the passing

so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot you racist.

Why did the pig cross the yard? Because the helicopter was chasing him.

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

rock crushes scissors, scissors are useless. scissors cut paper, little stips of paper are usless. paper covers rock, structure of rock remains intact.

Why are white people white? I don't know

What did a husband do when he came home to find his wife murdering their children? Nothing. There is no excuse for domestic violence.

Who has no penis Religious Believers

Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

what did the jew get for Christmas? cancer. and aids

Why did the hamster cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

It's that time of the month again... ...to cut my toenails.

your mama is so fat, she sat on the ipod touch and made the ipad.

Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

A man penetrates another man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...