Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Q: How do you make a baby float. A: Put it in a blender and add ice cream.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

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What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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A man walks into a library and asks for a book on suicide. The librarian quickly picks out such a book and hands it to him, because to deny him the book would break the conventions of a library.

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Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Whats white and goes up? a confused snowflake

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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apple was gonna make a smaller ipod for kids but decided not to because they didnt want the name to be itouch kids.

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What do u call a joke with no punchline? A joke with a kickline

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

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What did the gay man die of? Obesity.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops