So, Helen Keller walked into a bar....and then a stool, and then a counter, and then a table....

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Knock Knock Who's there? You You Who? Yes? Can I help you madam?

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Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Getting raped by a giant monkey

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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How many kleptomaniacs does it take to screw in a lightbulb? What lightbulb?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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I don't really like holocaust jokes because my grandpa was in it. Yeah he was drunk and fell off his guard tower.

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What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

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A women left the kitchen.

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Justin Bieber

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "why the long face?" The horse replies "my whole family was killed in 911... And I used the money I got from life insurance to get plastic surgery to always have a smile on my face. My doctor botched the surgery, so now my face is elongated. Even for a horse, of course."

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

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I hear eating an apple a day keeps the other apples in check.

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The teacher asked: If you have two apples, and I give you two, how many do you have now? FOUR said the student.

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THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

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Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a wh0re.

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Math Problem: John has 32 candy bars. He eats 28 of them. What does he have now? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops