Why did Suzy fall off the swing? As Suzy neared the ground while swinging, her foot caught a small hole in the swingset's pebble foundation, and the power of Suzy's momentum along with the sudden stop of Suzy's swing forced Suzy to fly forward off of the swing. Suzy, seeing the silliness of her mistake, laughed it off, and tried to get back up. She quickly realized that her leg had snapped in half. Suzy will never walk again.

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

How do you leave a guy in suspense ...

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

What do you call a guy with an axe in his head? Chuck

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

Why don't aliens eat clowns? Because the paint used on their faces makes the extra terrestrials leery of lead poisoning.

Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

What is the defference between Obama and an American? Obama doesn't have a birth certificate.

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

What do you call a white guy with 5 black guys. The owner of a basketball team

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

quantum physics?

"is it just me or is it getting really hot in here?" "the house is on fire and we are locked in"

SHUT UP JP

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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