How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Yo mama is so ugly that she won an award for that

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Hey I Just Met You , & This Is Crazy , But Here's My Status , So Like It Maybe ?

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney Loves you.

How do you make a little boy cry? Cut off his legs.

What musical band do you get if you keep shouting while in the mountain? The rolling stones. What do you get if you keep shouting in a snow covered mountain top? Blizzard Entertainment.

Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

What's gay black & Jewish? The Ku Klux Klan

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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