Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead

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Shltskc gw? G

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What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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A blind man walks into a bar. Nobody is surprised.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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Today I wanted to make world peace.... So I killed everyone.

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eyebrows up means ur flirting this isnt a joke dont laugh

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An American, a French man, and Jew were all in an airplane about to skydive. Their skydiving instructor comes out and says, "I'm sorry, there seems to've been a mistake and we only have two parachutes." The company refunds them, and they, while reasonably disappointed, agree to reschedule the lesson.

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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Q: Whats worse than dropping your ice cream? A: Dropping two ice creams. Q: Whats worse than dropping two ice creams? A: The Holocaust. Q: Whats worse than the Holocaust? A: Dropping three ice creams.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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