Today, both my parents were killed in a car accient. FML.

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What is black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, bleeding, mixed race babies.

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

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Have you seen the blind man's new house? No. Neither has he.

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what's worse than a dead baby in the bathtub? if the baby was named Grace.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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A guy walks into a bar. The second guy ducks.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Lol! The connection timed out. Double D`s they kill my back so I am gonna get them reduced someday, and sure because it gets really itchy otherwise.

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the ocean? A victim of the increasingly violent Mexican drug cartels.

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What do you call a cow with no legs. Dead, the farmer cut them off.

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What happened to the child drowning in a pool? He was saved by the well-trained lifeguard.

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During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

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Once upon a time, in a magical kingdom, there were too many similar jokes on anti-joke.com. One man thought he could be funny by writing a joke that referenced this, and be even funnier by referencing what he was referencing. Then he referenced that, then that, and so on until the layers of meta caused his brain to explode. Some of it landed in your mother's vagina.

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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Why did the man eat the apple? He had just witnessed a cow butchering and decided to become a vegitarian the moment he got home. He now lives in 1st degree depression because of what he saw 2 hours ago.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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Q. Why was 6 afraid of 7? A. Because 7 was a scary dude.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was at a crosswalk and the walk light was on.

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A father and his son get into an accident and are whisked away to the hospital. The father dies, and the son is brought into surgery. The doctor is rushed in, but looks at the boy and says "I can operate on this boy, his my son." How is this possible? The boy's father was a zombie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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