roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

Why was the man walking down the street late at night? Because he's homeless and has nowhere to stay.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

Why would Maria not have sex with Liam? Because she is Danish and doesn't shave and therefore is self-conscious

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

why was 6 afraid of 7? because seven is a murdering sociopath

What is the difference between Julis Ceaser, and the moon? The moon is covered in rocks and craters, and Julis Ceaser is DEAD

Pickle

Why wasn't cacto at school that day. Because Silas gave him extreme butthole aids.

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

Roses are gray Violets are gray I really wish That I wasn't color blind

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

Q: What happens after you have sex with Michelle Obama? A: You wake up and kill yourself.

A priest, a rabbi, and a muslim cleric walk into a bar. In Syria. Dead children.

Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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