Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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Have you seen that ad about starving children in Africa? It was pretty gay

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

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Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

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one time, there was this anti-joke.com joke set-up. It was just like a normal joke set-up. was the anti-joke punchline effective, artful of funny at all? no. it was a plain statement of some facts without consideration for humor. it gets old after you read like 50 of them. it gets REALLY. F*CKIN. OLD.

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Q:whats the wost thing that can happen to you when you find something? A:not finding something

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who is there? Not Suzie

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why did John fall off his bike I don't know I was not there it was a rumor at school

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE HERE'S A KNIFE KILL YOURSELF KANE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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Your momma's eyesight is so weak she needs a pair of glasses to see properly

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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whats funny? when isreal special forces hunted down nazis after ww2 and killed the fucks

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What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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A turtle walks into a bar. The bar tender says "what will it be?" the turtle doesnt reply because its a turtle and the bar tender is sent to a mental hospital for talking to turtles.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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