Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the tiger.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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whats then difference between a jew and a pizza ? A pizza doesnt scream when its put in the oven .

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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If you can cut half a rope. You can cut the whole rope.

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How do you tell a crazy man that he is on fire? You're on fire.

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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your mom is so fat, that your father is no longer attracted to her and it is tearing your family apart.

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For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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Pain Olympics.

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Why was the man lying on the pavement? He was hit by a fridge

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

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42

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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What do you call a Fly with no wings? Dead.

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Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops