Yesterday I saw a blind man walking down the street, I asked if he needed help and he said "I'm fine thanks." Later on I saw a deaf man walking down the street and asked if he needed help. He didn't hear me, he then fell off the curb and was hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's read,bubbly and looks out the window? A baby in a microwave

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call a group of black men stampeding down a hill? Dangerous, so they should slow down!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why is the baby not crying? Because it died of herpes. JUST KIDDING! Babies can't get herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

If I had a nickel for every time I heard that... I'd most likely have no money as I would spend it all on cocaine.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

knock knok Who's there The police, I regret to inform you your son was killed in a horrific traffic accident

thumb_up thumb_down -21

PICKLES

thumb_up thumb_down -21

an irishman an american and a jihadist get a plane were did they go right through my house

thumb_up thumb_down -21

NO! I'm putting it in my front room, you sick bastard!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what has wheels and is red. A heart, i lied about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

thumb_up thumb_down -21

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Whats the difference between a black man and a white man? the pigment in their skin.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Mexican? I dont care if you are Mexican or not really, it makes no difference to me, I know you, I seen you before. But seriously, I consider you a good friend and all, and it seems we both get along, but you know after stuff happens, are we still friends then or is this all just a mating game thing for you? You can be honest with me, I am a realist, and I kinda like the idea of,the day after tomorrow, wont deny that. Its just that I dont want to lose a good friend in the process, and if this is just you trying to score, then well, I guess its still nice knowing this side of you.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops