Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's wet and pink? Bubblegum!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? You shouldn't call him anything. He needs help. -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench isnt going anywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

thumb_up thumb_down +6

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

I? Everett

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is the difference?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

thumb_up thumb_down +4

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops