What's worse than losing your job? 9/11

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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In 2030, what will most people be doing for a living? Using food stamps.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Hey i just met you and this is crazy but your adopted banana

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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What would George Washington do if he was able to talk to all of America? Ask them to dig him up.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? It was my car.

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What does Chuck Norris order at a coffee shop? Coffee.

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

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David Cameron

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A man walked into a bar. He got drunk and left.

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Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops