Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

Why did the boy fall of his bike? Becuase he was hit by a couch.

Whats the difference between a jew and firewood? Firewood is meant to be burned in a stove or firepit while jews are functioning members of society.

Roses are red Im adopted

What do you get when a sister and a brother have sex? A deformed child.

A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

Want to hear a joke? I hope not because I don't know any.

What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

What happened to the fish? It drowned

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

What did the... Uh, I forgot the rest of the joke.

Why is a duck? Because one leg is both the same.

despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

Q: What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? A: A SMALL MEDIUM AT LARGE!

Why did the white guy die because he had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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