Q:what do you get when you get when you cross a dog and a human A: a human-dog hybrid with AIDS

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bite me

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A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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What did the Asian man say to the taxi driver? Diarrrhea

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What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it accidentally got out of it's pen. the farmer got very mad at the chicken for getting out, and very vicous-like, yelled at the chicken, causing it to get scared, and run to the other side. and that, is why the chicken crossed the road.

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What's Black, White, and Red all over? A Cow in a giant blender...

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roses are red violets are green id love to flick owen cliffords mams bean

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whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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How many omish people did it take to screw in a lightbulb.

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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"I see" said the blind man to the deaf man... On the phone

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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What did the straw say to the other straw? We are both straws just kidding they cant talk

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Why did Maggie shit herself? Because she saw her son.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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What do you get when you mix a turtle and a dog An animal

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Why do mexicans like burritos? Because they taste good.

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womens rights

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What did the atheist say as Jesus walked past? nothing, he ran to the nearest bar and called the insane asylum.

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What has three legs, one eye, and is green and fuzzy. I don't know. Me either.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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