A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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Why was the black man unemployed? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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69, Is funny because the numbers are backwards

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A fish walked into a bar. Actually it didn't, since fish can't walk.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender? A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car 2 hours later your brother finds you and told you that him and your wife have been cheating on you and your kid is his.

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What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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Q: Why did the Asian man get fired from his job? A: He sexually assaulted his co-workers

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

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What's red and every where? A bloody soldier who just stepped on mine.

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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why did tom shut his bedroom door? grandma was fingering herself

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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what does this mean: qiwiw98373jeu7e nothing significant, just shows the results of a mentaly disable student

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

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How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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