Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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white or wheat? wheat please.

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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My mom

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Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? A Holocaust in your apple.

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My jeans

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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