A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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what did the black man say to the Muslim? "you the bomb"!

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I felt like kicking something.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers who are you?

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Whats black on top and white on bottom? Rape.

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Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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(Knock knock) A:who is it? B:its the police open up where coming in B:I SAID OPEN THE BLOODY DOOR A:(SHIT)

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Why was the man's foot hurting? Because he was being fed into a wood chipper

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Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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A lion and a cheetah raced each other and the cheetah won Lion: "man you're a cheetah!" Cheetah: "no you're lion!" Then the cheetah tears off the lions head and feeds it to their babies

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Why didn't the man walk done the stairs? Because he had no legs

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you're momma's so fat, and i like fat chicks. is she home?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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I ounce had a parrot it talked buy never said im hungry so it died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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