Why did Chuck Norris eat a sandwich? Because he was hungry.

What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face is pretty messed up!

What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

My spelling is horrible

Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

Whats worse than the holocaust A: not much

A man walks into a bar. He buys a drink.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

What do you calk a dirty mexican? a hard working gardener.

Q: What did Steve say to his teacher on the first day of school? A: "My name is Steve."

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

when life gives you lemons throw them away.. they are probably bad

Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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