What do you call a dolphin mixed with a cheetah? I have no idea I was hoping you knew.

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

Why doesn't your dad want to have sex with your mom? Because my penis is already in her vagina, thus your dad's inability to place his penis in her vagina.

How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

what do u call a lesbian dinosaur? lickalotopuss

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

Why was the nympho sweating in the park? Because they were having sex on the bench.

What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

why couldn't the black man get a job? Because he was a violent sociopath with a criminal record.

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

Lil Wayne's song 6 foot 7 foot was named after my wewe

whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

There was 2 friends named Shutup and Trouble. They were camping and Trouble got lost in the woods. Shutup called the police. Shutup: Hello, is this 9-1-1 my friend is missing. Police: What is your name sir? Shutup: Shut up Police: What? Shutup: Shut up Police: What did you say? Shutup: I said Shut Up Police: Hey are you looking for TROUBLE? Shutup: Yes! Police: Guess what? We found him, he's safe in the station. We will have a officer come by a drop him off. Have a good day Mr. Shutup Shutup: Thank you

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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