Two men are stranded in a structure on an alien planet, they are frightened when they are told that there is evidence of a life form near them, they explore their surroundings and find a snake-like creature that flares what looks like wings, bites one of the men on the hand and wraps its tail around his arm squeezing it until the arm breaks (we see the bone poke through his sleeve and he screams); the creature slithers up his sleeve, into his mask and lunges into his mouth killing him, and the other man is sprayed on the mask with acid and we see the plastic of the mask melt onto his face.

What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

Jack wasn't nimble. Jack wasn't quick. Jack sat on the candle and burned his corduroys.

women's rights.

Why do black people like watermelon? Because it good you racist bastard!

why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

Roses are brown I likes clouds This joke isn't funny so don't laugh

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

A Black Child just received his ivy-league diploma and hugged his dad.

A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

b

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychological disorder.

What is the difference between a refrigerator? Seven anchors because blue isn't vital for turtles to fornicate.

Why did the cab driver talk about the Holocaust? Because he began to shart his pants while singing pocket full of sunshine as a royal blue pancake swerved across the terrain.

Roses are red Violets are purple. I just realized that nothing rhymes with "Purple".

Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

The funniest thing happened in my dream last night, i dreamed that banks would stop ripping people off and start treating people like humans. How wierd is that :D

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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