What's the difference between a jew and a bottle of ketchup? People actually like ketchup.

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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Why did Daniel Nitz cross the road during rush hour? Because he's an idiot.

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How do you get a dog to stop humping you? Pick him up and suck his dick.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The mailman. The mailman who? Anthrax.

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Your mamma is so fat that she is undergoing strict diet and exercise in order to reduce the risk of premature death due to health complications.

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You get the census of income per citizen and see who is at the top.

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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how did the farmer die? his dog shot him

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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A man went to his doctor and said, "Doctor, every time I hit my hand with a hammer, it hurts!" Then both him and his doctor died; so it didn't matter.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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Why did the blonde run into a screen door? Because screen doors are difficult to see when one is running at full speed

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

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Jesse uses a prescription shampoo called " greasey poop" because he feels like his hair doesnt look greasy enough. He cries himself asleep every night because he wants a slim body like the rest of the cool kids, so he eats his pain away, which digs him an even deeper hole. the life of Jesse zigenbein is quite tragic to say the least. Please donate 10$ to the "eat ourselves to sleep" campaign

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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Even dyslexic people attend church and pray to Dog.

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Paul was mowing his lawn when he felt a bump. It turned out it was a bunny. Paul felt bad but the bunny felt worse

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A black man and a white man walk into a job interview. Neither of them get the job due to lack of skill in the field.

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Three black men was in a car. They were going on holiday.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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