What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

What's worse than forgetting to charge your cell phone battery? Getting wrongfully accused and going to jail and get raped by inmates for the rest of your life.

Knock knock. Who's there? To To Who? To Whom.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm Schizophrenic And so am I.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

Knock knock? Who's there? Not Schrodinger's cat, or is it?

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

The man said to his wife love hurts. the wife then progressed with punching in the face.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Suzy has no arms! Knock Knock! Who's There? The Holocaust

Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

why didn't the printer work? it was in the toilet.

Q: Why didn't Little Jhonny go to school today? A: There was no school today.

What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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