How was my day, you ask? First of all, I don't own a day. And second of all, it hasn't ended.

Q: why didn't the asian boy ask for a calculator? A: you don't need calculators to make shoes

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

Roses are red Violets are blue The other color on our flag is white I'm an American and rhyming doesn't matter

What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

whats the difference between a black man playing basketball and a white man playing basketball? They are different races

how do you find will smith in the snow? look for his teeth

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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