Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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Chris Bosh's neck

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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Q: how do you fit 100 jews in a car A: 3 in the back one in the passenger seat and 96 in the ash tray

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Why did the little girl cry? Her mom died

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I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

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why did the boy laugh? cause he was reading this joke!

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How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

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Whats the difference between an apple and a chicken? Many, many things

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What blew the baby's mind? Daddy's knuckles.

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What the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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Friends are a lot like trees They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe

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Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

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whate white and cant climb trees? powdered sugar

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why did the pancake eat a spanish holiday? Because a plane crashed into his condominium

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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How are Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga similar? They are both men except Justin Beiber

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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