A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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Why did the ground beef taste funny? Because little Timmy fell in the grinder.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Shiiit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Taken from all sorts of species! Fa-la-la-la-la lala-lala! Bengal tiger, kangaroo, African elephant, blue whale too! Shit the halls with chunks of feces! Fa-la-la-la-lala-lala!

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How many cops does it take to change a light bulb? None. They just beat it for being black.

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So I said to the man "That's no banana, thats my wife!"

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Where did little Timmy go when the bomb dropped? Everywhere.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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What's clear on the outside and grey on the inside? An elephant in a plastic bag.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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Guess what? What. This joke isn't funny

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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here is a good joke... your moms a bitch END OF STORY!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops