Why did the skeleton cross the road? Because Apocalypse arrived and dead people now have the ability to walk.

I would very much love to meet you again Erron, call me sometime I do not care how you get my number.

Why hasn't little Johnny ever had a clown at his birthday party? Johnny is an underprivileged Hispanic member of the community.

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

Knock Knock Who's There Trick or Treat!!!

how old is god? i don't know thats why i'm asking you. by: Brennan pickrell

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

Knock Knock! ... Whos there? ... Daisy ... Daisy who? ... Daisy me trolling... ;)

what did the black, asian and jew have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantoulope.

rawrrrrrrrrrrr

How old are you? 7

A penguin walked into a bar. Just kidding, it waddled at an increasingly fast rate.

Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

What's Great and Danish? The Great Dane Kane.

whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

I will create more jobs for americans

You no what the biggest lie in history is? Agreeing to the terms and services whenever you sign up for a website

A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesnt rhyme And your entire family died trying to fly to your house for Christmas. They crashed into a orpanage for death children. There were no survivors.

Gawds Trololols: Jewsus: I die for ur Sins, now u are free! *argh* Gawd AD 3000: TIME TO DIE SINNERS! Jewsus: But I paid for humanity`s sins and am stuck in hell because of this and... Gawd: Meh just didnt really liek you TROLOLOL! Gawds Trololols 2 directors clit: Gawd: Jebus! (the third) I want you to trololol peeps now! GO! Jebus: As you see people, I have died for you in order to prove that I am immortal! Peeps: Uh, wow? Jebus: TROLOLOL! So dad, when am I gonna get back to earth again, I kinda promised my boyfriends/apostles that there would be a second cumming as you told me to do, and people have been waiting for over twothousand and fourtee... Gawd: Never! Trolololol! Moral: "Would you trust a being whose veins are loaded with alcohol?" Jesus 2: The second coming: In cincemas never!

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Oh shit my gardens on fire

Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...