If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Presents

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Where did Ben go after being hit by a high speed train? Underneath the train's wheels.

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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What is worse than being killed in a car crash? Having your girlfriend in the car with you.

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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There is a hawk and a squirrel sitting in a tree. a farmer walks by with a strange package so the hawk turns to the squirrel and says nothing because he is an animal and incapable of speech, he then eats the squirrel because he is a bird of prey.

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What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

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What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

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Whats the difference between males and females? fe

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I have a really funny joke.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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Your momma is so old, she qualifies for multiple financial aid programs provided by the government.

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Why couldn't the old man see? He was deaf

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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A bald man walks out a bar crying Prostate cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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