Why did the black man jump high? He was on a pogo stick

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Why did the chicken Cross the road? Because a Blackman was chasing his dinner

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There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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Why didn't the mexican make the basketball team? He had never practiced and was overweight

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Two Scientologists walk into a bar. For $5,000 you can hear the rest of this joke.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a microwave? If you don't know the difference you need a psychiatrist.

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a blonde does something stupid. she dies. its funny.

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So a boy walks into a bar. He broke his arm and now is severly crippled

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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Why did the bus crash? Because the bus driver was a potato.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis. -Rivrawr

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my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

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A man takes his girlfriend ice skating on a lake. As they are ice skating she says "we should go back home and fu..." At this point they fall through a thin spot on the ice and they both drown in the lake. Fish ate their dead bodies

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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Whats big black and hairy? A large black dog.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops