Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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There's a black guy, a yellow guy, and a white guy. Which one survives? All of them do. See. I'm not racist!

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What do Gary Glitter and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both successful pop stars

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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I got pussies, cocks, asses and bitches. In my animal store.

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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What is green and is not grass A frogg

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What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

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Why did the deer stop running? It was hit by a car

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

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What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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An Englishman, a Welshman, an Irishman and a Scotsman are all stranded on a desert island. After several days spent utilizing the survival skills they had been taught in the Royal Navy, they were eventually evacuated by fellow sailors searching for them. As the only survivors, their stories were vital in preventing such shipwrecks in future.

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Why was Sally sad? She was the only survivor of a plane crash that killed her entire family.

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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