the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

What is faster? A mustang or a corvette? A fighter jet you stupid idiotic piece of crap!

Der Ter-Rerks, nern ter serrentersts ers "Terernerserers Rerks", wers er dernerser dert lerved ern der Certersers perrerd. Ert wers er mert erter, prering ern smerler, plernt-erterng dernersers serch ers herdrersers ernd serrerperds. Ert erser hernterd der herned herberver Tersererterps, werd erverderns erf ferts ferned ern der ferserlersed rermerns.

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

Do you play piano? No

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

Why was lady crying? Because her ten yer old son died of cancer..

what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans.

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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