What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

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Chris Brown walks into a bar. And then is politely asked to leave as the bar owner also happens to be the spokesperson for an anti-domestic violence group.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the lizard fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the moneky

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

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The teacher asked her class "What is 42 + 17?" Several hands were flung into the air. "71!" said Billy excitedly. "No, I'm sorry that is incorrect." said the teacher. "67!" shouted Carl at the top of his lungs. "Incorrect!" said the teacher. Then little Johnny raised his hand. "The answer is 69" he said full of intellectual delight. "Very good." said the teacher.

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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How can you tell if someone is a global warming alarmist? Their IQ on average is 10 points below normal

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Q: Whats better than not being a Jew? A: Being a Jew.

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Why did little Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms knock knock who's there? Not little Suzie.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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Knock-Knock Who's there? The The Who? The Beatles!

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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What's the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? An elevator helps society

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

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what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

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Jim just got laid off at the office. He believes his life is going to hell, so he commits suicide. His wife then later was blamed for his death because they were having many arguments. She was sentenced to life and slowly rotted in prison for the rest of her life. Their children then are moved around from foster home to foster home and they grow up to be drug dealers.

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

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Women are only good for seventy-one things: Love A proper home to come home to everyday 69

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What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops