How many dead babies does it take to change a lightbulb? None they're dead.

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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A man walks off the top of a very tall building. Why did he fall off? Because he was blind

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What do you call an arab flying a plane? A pliot

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9/11 my birthday

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Person1: wanna hear a joke? Person2: yeah Person1: ok

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So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

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What scares little children and befriends their parents? A clown

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What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

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what did the little boy say to his sibling? dat not funny!

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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I got stopped for speeding the other day. The policeman said I had to pay a £50 fine. I was gutted. However, later that night I had amazing sex with my wife, which helped me to take my mind off things a bit.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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How can you finally get your girlfriend to scream in the bedroom? Store the bodies there.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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Q-Why did the little boy feel hot? A-Because he faceplanted into a bonfire.

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Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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