Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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time to spruce up!

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Q: What lives in holes? A: Jerks.

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What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

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A Mormon walks out of a bicycle store.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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How can you ruin someone's day? Tell them their mother has cancer. No really, I found out my mom has cancer a week ago.

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guess what? bannanas

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Where's the soap?

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Why cant Stevie Wonder see his friends? Because he is married.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops