What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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whats worse than getting ur penis cut off......no holocaust

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

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What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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What's worse than biting into a worm in your apple? Being run over by a stampede of elephants

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What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and my cousins? Nothing.

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What's worst than the holocaust? Coming home and having your parents say " we received an email from your teacher today"

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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They say laughter is the best medicine but i've always found it hard to laugh at cancer.

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What do you get when you cross a rooster with a cocker spaniel? Nothing, because roosters and Dog's don't mix.

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What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

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An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

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What do you call a Serbian-Australian man with no arms, no legs, and two feet. Nick Vujicic

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roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

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YODO (unless you're religious background encourage you to believe in an afterlife of some sort, be it of animalia or homo sapien decent.

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Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops