what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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A man walks into a restaurant and asks a waiter, "Do you serve crabs here?" The waiter says, "Certainly! In fact, stuffed crab is today's special."

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some kid told me pink dolphin clothiing was nigged, so i took an eraser , gave it to his sister and beat the poop out of hiis car ON A THURSDAY!!!!!!

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

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What do you call a dog with no legs Nothing it won't come

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens can walk wherever the hell they want. Leave them alone.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Two muffins are in the oven. They don't say anything because muffins can't talk. The end.

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a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

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A man walks into a bar. Three weeks later he gets a liver transplant.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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Bill is driving along the Interstate.All the sudden, a refrigerator falls off the truck in front of him.The fridge slams into Bill's car.He dies instantly.

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Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

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Knock Knock Fuck off. I am new here. I do not know anyone here.

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Knock-Knock Who's there? Ketchup. Ketchup who? Ketchup-mustard.

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What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What did the woman say to the jew? Do you want an almond?

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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