I'm not hungry, so when my mon offered me a pear I said to her "No thanks, I'm not hungry". 

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

What do grass and deer have in common? They're both green I lied about the deer

What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Jay-z

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

what better than getting an F on a test? getting an A on a test.

Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

Your momma's so dumb she graduated high school with a C average.

did you see stevie wonder's new guitar no neither did he

your friend is gay, but you are not. nothing happens

Is this the Krusty Crab? Yes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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