What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

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it

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen? Probably around seven.

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What is the street value of Amy Winehouse's ashes? Nothing. They are ashes, not drugs.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Knock knock who's there Betty Betty who?` ` my grandmother who passed away 2 years ago dont talk about her that was

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

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Why did nobody bother to help the old lady cross the road? Because her actions in recent years had given rise to considerable division and ill-feeling within the community.

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

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Why did he chicken cross the road? The suicide rate in chickens has gone up 50% in the past year alone.

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LET'S PLAY CARDS SHUFFLE THE DECK *person with a deck-patio* no please don't

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what's the only thing funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? The look on the mom's face.

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Why does Rebecca Black like Friday? Because it's the start of the weekend

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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What's worse than a piece of food stuck between your teeth? I don't know, what? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops