DAVE : did you hear the one about the poster? MICHAEL: what?

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He--Hey guys

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Why did the English man walk into a bar? Do get an alcoholic beverage to temporarily forget the pain of his recent divorce.

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What did the transvestite say to the fox? 'scuse me, you've got something on your shoe.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Haikus are easy. But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

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Ask me about my wiener. How's your wiener? I don't have a wiener, I'm a woman.

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Hai Patrick Hai Patrick

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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You!!!!!! Cause your whole existence is just one big joke.

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm not good at poems, nice tits.

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YOU KNOW YOU'RE AS FAT AS JESSE WHEN... 1. The scales don't go up to the weight you weigh. 2. You know the true meaning of the word Plus-Size. 3. You can't see your feet without sitting down.

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How many black teachers does it take to figure out 10 x 30. only one shes a very respected teacher

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Dylan F is stupid He goes to his cousins house Then falls into a pit Moves on

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what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

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NASCAR being considered a sport.

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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What do you call a deer with only one leg? A one legged deer. What do you call a deer with one leg, one eye and lives in Rome? Still a one legged deer.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

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Q: What did the hooker say to the priest? A: That was a wonderful sermon. I look forward to next Sunday's church service.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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