what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, purple is a color, I like grilled cheese

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To men stay at the bar all night drinking non stop. They soon are rushed to the hospital to get their stomachs pumped.

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Why did the blonde do at the WTC on 9/11? Die.

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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What do you call a joke that isn't funny? A joke that isn't funny.

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What's the scariest thing about the dark? There's a black man in my bed.

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How many cans does the average alcoholic drink in one night? None. Cans are solid and therefore cannot be drank.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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How do you make a twelve year old girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear.

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What do you call a blonde at the beach? A dipthong.

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hey guys im gay

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

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What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

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what do you call a clown in makeup? a clown, clowns are supposed to wear makeup.

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why didn't the chicken cross the road... because it got hit by a truck

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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what did the maker of anti jokes website say while reading some of the jokes on here? these people r idiots. and he lived happily ever after. then died. Good one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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