What did the the water hose say to the man? Nothing, but the sight of water made the man thirsty and he drank to excess and died from dilution of his blood.

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Why did the dinosaurs go extinct? Well many scientists have theorized that a giant meteor hit the earth causing the extinction of most living things. Also if your christian : Dinosaurs never existed, evolution is the devils work, science is not the answer to the world's problems. Darwin was a foolish man, and thats that.

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What do two zebras look like next to each other? Two zebras

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

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are u black unlucky

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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Who's dumb and retarted. A person that is dumb and retarted.

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So, there was two monkeys sitting in a bath tub one says "Hey, could you pass the soap?" the other says "what do I look like a typewriter?"

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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the wild black man is searching for food. He spots a KFC, and goes wild. He then proceeds to get in line.

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Your momma is so hot your dad married her. She then slept around with other men. Your dad found out and now they're divorced.

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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What do Black people call their fathers? Dad.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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What did the man do after his wife died? He farted.

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What begins with "F" and ends in "uck"? There are multiple words or word combinations that begin with "F" and end in "uck," such as fat duck, so you dont need me to tell you, be creative.

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Why did the bird plummet to the earth? It was shot.

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Who has two thumbs and gets to go home tomorrow? Well, not your son. He's in a persistent vegetative state and we had to amputate both of his arms.

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What would the Swatch be called if it was made by a Croatian company? A Crwatch.

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- Helen Keller

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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