How do you stop R Kelly from peeing on little girls? Kill all little girls.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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How do you make a kid with ADHD stay still? Shoot him in the knee cap

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

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what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

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42

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? A pilot you racist bastard!

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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autistic kids rock

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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Why didn't Jenny's mom give her any Christmas presents? She was a selfish, mean, woman and didn't care about her children.

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Why did the homosexual man buy the antijoke book he enjoys reading

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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When geese fly in the V formation why is there always one side longer than the other? Because theres more geese on that side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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