Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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How do you run faster than a cheetah? Cut off its legs.

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Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Ask me if I'm a watermelon. Are you a watermelon? No...

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why was the white girl not wanting to have a baby with her boyfriend he was black

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A guy walks into a doughnut shop and says "I'll have a small coffee and a doughnut." The shop keeper says, "I'm sorry we ran out of coffee." The guy says, "All right I'll just have coffee than"

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q: what do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex? a: sex, just like everyome else calls it

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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Have ever seen Helen Keller's house? No. Neither has she.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the Batmobile? Get in the Batmobile.

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In other news, a Florida man was arrested today for stealing candy...with a knife.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She technically could have, she was physically able, but cars were not invented yet, and even if they were it is unethical for any humane person to let a blind and def person drive.

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Why did Jerry Sandusky appeal his conviction? Because the judge wrongly considered inadmissible evidence.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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What do you call a black man with a gun? Officer.

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Yo momma is so stupid, she is in rehab and will unlikely get over her mental illness leading to her soon and fatal death.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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What happened when the nigga looked up his family tree? A gorilla shit in his face

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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Polly went out for a fag. Then she was raped.

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Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops