What did the kid say to the ice-cream Man Can I have a duck please

Two bars walk into a guy, and the bartender says, "You're telling the joke wrong, stupid!"

What did the kitty say when it's owner called him over? Nothing. It's owner killed him.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Repeated jokes.

what do you get with a bulldog and a shi-tzhu 2 dogs.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

whats worse than 1 bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

Q: Suzy loves apples, she will do anything to get her hands on an apple. Why didn't she eat Tom's apple? A: She ate someone elses apple and then he killed her before she could get to tom's!!!

why did the kid strike out in baseball he had leprosy and his arms were amputated

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Your mum is dead, Just fucking with you! Kelvin Yang.

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

Why did the blond paint in the nude? because she couldn't find her clothes, and wanted to express her emotions through art

Who let the dogs out? The burglar, he broke the door and they ran out.

what do you call a black man, white man, mexican, irishman, indian, and chinese man being hung at the same time? -a racially diverse pirate crew

What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

Why did the car break down? Because breakfast was done.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

i wonder who made this website? a human

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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