What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I jack off

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "That's the ugliest baby that I've ever seen." The woman goes to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her, "That driver just insulted me!" The man says, "You go right up there and tell him off! Go ahead, I'll hold your monkey for you."

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Internet Explorer

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Most poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

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why did the panda and puppy get into a fight? how should i know, you tell me.

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What did the Frog say to the other Frog? Nothing they can't speak

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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I find Holocaust jokes hilarious, Anne Frankly I know a few...

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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roses are red violets are blue your friend is a scumbag and so are you

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? A. Spot

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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Q. bob had 93 chocolate bars and ate 74 what does he have now? A. diabetes

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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What do you call a latino with a limp? John...his name is John

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How is a hamster like a cigarette? They are harmless until you stick them in your mouth and light them on fire

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whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

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What did the astronaut say when he stepped on the moon? Oops, sorry.

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen A submarine you pervert

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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