Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

thumb_up thumb_down +20

A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the cat say when it was hungry? Meow.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are are red Violets are blue I just ate a crockpot!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

thumb_up thumb_down +20

So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Physics. Why did Tommy fall of his bike? He was hit by 3 monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did nick kiss esther because he cheated

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did god make women? Because women are equally important when it comes to the birth to maintain or species.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: seven raped six's mom

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red, Violets are blue; In Soviet Russia, POEM WRITES YOU!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's big fat and ugly? A monster

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did Carl the cat die? he didnt. he's still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? one, hes an electrician

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the black man do when KFC got his order wrong? He gave his receipt to the cashier and kindly asked for the correct meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the depressed teenage fat kid do to resolve his issues? Commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops