how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar answer his cell phone? Because he's DEAD.

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Q: Why should you never let Jerry Sandusky babysit your children? A: Because, in November of 2011, Sandusky was arrested and charged with 40 counts of sexual abuse of young boys over a 15-year period. A man with this type of background does not seem like a an ideal choice for a babysitter.

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What's worse than falling off a horse? Falling off a cliff.

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2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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What did the farmer say to the cow that asked for food? No.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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Why can't Hellen Keller have kids? Because she's dead, therefore does not possess the ability to bear children.

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A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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what's a snake that has no legs a snake

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what did the paraplegic get for his birthday? a bike...

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What do you call a white basketball player? A very athletic hardworking dedicated human being.

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Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

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Why did the black guy cross the road? He didn't because he forgot to precede crossing the busy street with caution; therefore he was critically injured and then placed in a hospital.

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Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

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What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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You know what pansies remind me of? What? A flower

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops