Why was the boy sad? His cookies are gone.

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Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

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Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were 5 brothers chasing it with a bat.

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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What is the biggest lie of 2011? "I do"- Kim kardashian

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

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Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

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What's green and doesn't fly? A broken green helicopter.

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What happend to the dude who couldnt fart He blew up

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Hey are you from tennessee? Because I recognize your accent and I grew up there also.

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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How does a black guy die? Unknown

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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What did the fat man order at McDonalds? Nothing, he was on a diet

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops